The main reason for my life-long melancholy is the lack of passion in my vocation. I desperately want to grab onto something that I really feel passionate about, and also supports me financially and has social value especially to my family, community and country (US is too big for me, so it got to be Nepal). I do not think that someone out of the blue is going to come and lay my dream voaction on my feet and say "please take it". So the only alternative is me. In other words, I have to be something I have never been in my life before, I need to be a go getter.
Before I go and try to get "it", I need to know what "it" is. But it may not be easier to find given that
